Tell us a bit about yourself.
I am Kofi. I grew up in a small town, where we were taught that a man must be strong, that we don’t talk about fear or stress. I work hard to provide for my family, and I take pride in being responsible. But life can be tough, and sometimes, even strong men feel overwhelmed.
What does your anxiety look like?
For a long time, I didn’t even know I had anxiety. I thought I was just stressed. But then I started waking up with a tight chest, and my heart would race like I had just finished running. At work, my mind jumped from one worry to another, making it hard to focus. I couldn’t sleep well, and my stomach often felt uneasy.
Then one day, I had what I now know was a panic attack. My vision blurred, my hands went cold, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I truly thought I was dying. That was when I realised something was wrong.
How do you manage anxiety?
At first, I ignored it, you know. I thought I just needed to “man up.” But after that panic attack, I decided to talk to an elder at my church. He told me something I will never forget: “A man is strong not because he hides his struggles, but because he faces them.”
Now, I take small steps to manage my anxiety. I practice deep breathing when I feel overwhelmed. I take walks in the evening with my dog, and I’ve cut down on coffee. I had no idea that coffee was making me more anxious. Anyway, talking to trusted people, like a friend, my pastor, or even a professional, has helped me understand that anxiety is not weakness. It’s a challenge, but it can be managed.
Any last thoughts?
If you’re struggling with anxiety, know that you are not alone. It doesn’t make you less of a man, and it’s not something to be ashamed of. Ask for help, even when it’s hard to and take care of yourself. Oh and get a dog!